It had been a long three weeks. Christmas had passed. New Years came and went without a bang, and my sister remained in ICU on a ventilator. It was all beginning to wear on me. I was up there most days because I was convinced I needed to “drive the care” to ensure she got what she needed. The advantage of working in the healthcare industry is you know all the ins and outs. The disadvantage is you know way too much to trust.
I became discouraged because I knew something was wrong. Her treatment plan was not right. The physician and I were in disagreement. I knew my sister was ready to come off the ventilator. She was awake but she was tied down, unable to move. Though she could not speak or communicate well, she begged me for help. I made the decision to bring in a physician who specializes in ventilator care, whom I knew and trusted.
I was standing by my sisters bed when I looked up and saw Dr. Julie Nguyen walking towards me. I don’t think I have ever seen a visual picture of what it means to trust God until that moment. As she came into the room , all my fears and worries of the last three weeks vanished and I was at peace in an instant. Psalm 91:14-15 says that God wants us to respond to him in that same way.
"If you’ll hold on to me for dear life.” says God, “I’ll get you out of any trouble, I’ll give you the best of care if you’ll only get to know me and trust me. Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times,…” The Message
Funny, the first thing out of Dr. Nguyen’s mouth was, “Why didn’t you call me sooner? Don’t worry, we will get your sister off the ventilator.“ And that night, she did just that!
The weight was lifted when Dr. Nguyen took over Marion’s care because I trusted her completely. It was not about the outcomes as much as the knowledge that she was trustworthy. Her confidence allowed me to leave all the details of Marion’s care to her. From that day forward, I no longer hovered or questioned every decision. I no longer tried to take control of the circumstance, as if it all depended on me.
Over the years of following Jesus, the one thing I did that completely prepared me for the trials ahead, was the simple day in and day out of getting to know Him. When you get to know Him, you can’t help but trust Him. This would continue to play a crucial role in the journey that had just begun and was far from over.
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